So 5 bloggers walk into a bar…

So 5 bloggers walk into a bar…

So it’s 20 years in the future, and these five old bloggers walk into a bar on 6th Street to reminisce about the glory days.

Blogger 1: “I remember sitting at this very table, arguing about the nature of the web. Then it hit me: categories are how people understand information! If I could own a category, I would draw the traffic and the revenue. Search naturally funnels eyeballs toward the top few sites. AdSense did the rest. And that’s how I made my fortune.”

Blogger 2: “Hey, I remember your site! I used to read it every day before I took on President Armstrong’s re-election campaign in 2016. I think you’re dead wrong about category, though…it’s all about content. You had great writing. I learned something every day from it. So yeah, category got you there, but content is what kept us. And because the content was good, we trusted your opinion. Great writing. Great insights. Useful links. And really funny. It worked for El Dooce in our campaign too…the people felt they could trust someone who so embraced pooping and by extension: diversity and tolerance. I mean, we all poop, right? And that’s how we built our powerbase…quality content. People loved it, and their hearts followed.”

Blogger 3: “Heh, I remember that first debate between Armstrong and those other assholes. They thought they could attack her character with citations from her own blog. The flicker of panic across their faces, when they realized that the old ways of character assassination don’t work when half the audience grew up reading her blog and had already formed their own opinions about her character…man, that was priceless. They just looked like cardboard cutouts of real people by comparison. Information transparency break down fear, uncertainty and doubt! That’s when I knew that it wasn’t category or content that ruled the world…it’s context. The old regimes were masters at manipulation through controlling the context of our information experience. In the old world, when nothing was really verifiable except through the inbred reporting of The Old Media, everything seemed equally credible or ludicrous. I made my fortune by creating a personal context management tool, leveraging the wisdom of informed crowds to find the relevant patterns in so-called reported fact. The Old Media…they were great at building a news reporting organizations, and in the scramble to chase advertising revenues through market size, as opposed to the value in factually clarifying the state of the world. Idiots.”

Blogger 4: “You said it, girl! When I found your site, I discovered things about myself that I didn’t know were important. You helped me find my community too…that’s what gave me power and confidence! It was a lot like my first SXSW, the first year they held it on the moon. I was hanging out at the WordPress party, floating upside down over this giant picture window, looking down upon the Earth. The first thing I thought was that the Earth looks weird without a cartoon animal humping it. The second thing was that it was home, and that I wished other people could be up here too and get the feeling that we are all from the same place. At the same time, I was at this great party with a community of people who believed in the coolness of what we were doing…democratizing the creation of information, and using those pathways to find each other in real life in a way that was empowering and non-sucky. Writing that e-voting plugin for WordPress just sort of fell out of that, and who knew that Diebold would be out-of-business three years later because of it? My life is better because of the community we founded, and the positive energy that came from that.”

Blogger 5: “Wow, it’s great to meet all of you. I’ve read all your blogs for years, and for me it wasn’t really context, content, category, or community. Well, they were all important, but what made the difference was continuity. I read you guys every day. I got to know you. It grounded me in the torrent of information spewing from the web, because I felt I knew you were you stood, and that helped me see my own life in perspective. You know how ‘all politics is local’? Well, that applies to everything…business is local, best friends are local, experiences are local. We’re more fully engaged when all our senses are used and when we have common experiences. I recognized that the Internet was a new form of shared locality, just like everyone else, but I made my fortune by recognizing that maintaining any form of continuity is magic. It’s the foundation of relationship, and real relationships are what makes things doable.”

Bartender: “I thought this entry was going to be some kind of a funny joke.”

Me: “Sorry. I thought so too.”


  1. Tim Foreman 18 years ago

    President Dooce Armstrong. I like it. :)

  2. rick 18 years ago

    “The first thing I thought was that the Earth looks weird without a cartoon animal humping it.”

    I think I have a new mail sig

  3. Nollind Whachell 18 years ago

    “By George, I think he’s got it!”

    You may be interested in these books below if you’re going down the path that I think you are. You’ll find a lot of more interesting things related to what you just spoke about.

    Find Our Way by Margaret J. Wheatley

    Permaculture by David Holmgren

  4. Mari 18 years ago

    Such a great post title!  Very fun post.  :) Thanks!

  5. satch 17 years ago

    I know I have a new email sig grin

    Very nice David, but how does continuity mesh with ‘grounding’ us in context with information on the Internet?

    Doesn’t that just provide us with an illusory ‘comfort zone’ that could serve to conceal the ‘truth’ of content.  Or even worse, ingrain falsehood and fallacy.

  6. Dave Seah 17 years ago

    Interesting question! I think continuity is subjective (and therefore illusory) to begin with, but it’s also what gives me a sense of progress. One can think of continuity as the appearance of cause and effect, or even as the FALLACY of CAUSALITY in many cases. A useful fallacy sometimes in terms of world view, but as you note also possibly misleading. It depends on how much you have riding on it, I suppose.

    On the other hand, there are PLENTY of ways to conceal, obscure, misinterpret, and adapt content to begin with, so maybe just being aware the content itself can’t exist in a vacuum without someone else looking at it is the critical realization: the act of observing and considering transmutes the content into some else’s unique experience, which is shaped by what we’ve experience in the past and what we think we know now.

    In terms of film editing, it reminds me of juxtaposition; if you put two random images together one-after-the other, our mind forms some kind of story out of it. We can’t help it. And what’s interesting is that the order matters…A before B is different from B before A. And likewise, the amount of time makes a difference, how we’re feeling, what we’ve seen before, etc…all of these factors create a subjective experience that is unique in the particulars.

    What I’m saying is that we can’t escape our own continuity, and things we encounter on the internet becomes part of it, shaping our ideas about the world. Being aware that this is the case gives one some power in communicating with people, is all.

  7. Lauchlin 17 years ago

    You forgot the 6th blogger.

    6th Blogger: Nobody reads my blog anyway, so I guess I’ll just whine.  I thought the web was about popularity.

    How did I get here and where are my pants?

    (excellent post btw)

  8. Dave Seah 17 years ago

    Lauchlin: Instead of popularity, I’d say CELEBRITY, so it also begins with C like the others. :-)

  9. kung foodie kat 17 years ago

    “I was hanging out at the WordPress party, floating upside down over this giant picture window, looking down upon the Earth. The first thing I thought was that the Earth looks weird without a cartoon animal humping it.”

    Best blog quote evar!!!