The Darth Side

My sister forwarded me a link to Darth Vader’s Blog, which chronicles his daily travails as he hunts down the rebel scum at the bidding of his Dark Master (“Boy, does that guy like to hear himself talk”, notes Darth in an aside). Though his hands are full dealing with idiots and the incompetence that surrounds him, Darth finds the time to share his thoughts with us:

Bolts blazed across the face of the great pink gas giant, the fleeing jalopies shattering in a series of little flashes. Captain Piett arrived at my side and saluted. “M’lord, we have established communications with the settlement. They claim to be a mining colony. Our close range scans show technology consistent with that claim.” He added, “They beg us not to attack.” I nodded slowly, lost in a trance. I closed my eyes and sought out the node in the net of the Force I had so faintly detected two days ago, and it was still there…down below, in the clouds of Bespin. There was significance there, there was meaning there, trembling just beneath the surface. I would seize it! “Prepare my shuttle and an armed escort. I will see this mining colony for myself.” “But Lord Vader, what if it’s a rebel trap?” bleated Admiral Ozzel, his moustache twitching. “Leave that to me.”

And of course, people can leave comments for Darth. He generally is pretty good about answering.