Ground Hog Day Resolution Review Day 10: Wrapping Up the Year

Today is 12/12, the very last day of my Groundhog Day Resolutions, an experiment to replace ineffective "New Year's Resolutions" with a system worked with my actual lifestyle. You can read about it in more depth here, but the gist is to wait until you're settled in for the year and make your resolutions on February 2nd aka Groundhog Day. To make sure I followed through with my resolutions, I picked 3/3, 4/4, 5/5, and so on to be Groundhog Day Resolution Review Days (GHDRRDs), to see how things were going.

The full year has wrapped up for me, so I will review my resolutions and evaluate the performance of the GHDRR system. Overall I think it's worked pretty well for what it is: I was able to remind myself of my bigger goals more than once a year. There are refinements that could be made, of course, which I'll touch upon later. First, let me see how I did overall for the year for my personal goals.

Three Goals Reviewed

I had three main goals, all them related to making adjustments to my hybrid life/career. My understanding of these goals has changed over time and, I think, has deepened:

(1) Commit to Deriving Income from Writing and Making Stuff -- I originally picked this goal to test a hypothesis: if I like blogging and creating forms so dang much, would I be happier and more successful if I could pursue this full time? Underlying this goal is a question about identity: Am I a writer? Am I comfortable presenting that role to the world? Am I a maker? Am I ready to present myself as such? This is a significant departure from the service-based New Media Designer / Developer niche that I've been in for the bulk of 2006.

{2} Build Sustainable Social Networks -- In 2004, I was quite isolated from the rest of the world, wondering what I should do. Thankfully, I met some wonderful people that got me interested in the world again. I discovered that I could create my own groups, and that it really took very little to sustain them: have some experiences and things to share, be genuinely interested in sharing them, and meet regularly no matter what. Through the blog, I met some very cool people and ended up going to SXSW for the first time, which hammered home the point that meeting like-minded people face to face is one of the most energizing things a body can do. However, all that socializing takes a lot of time and energy, so my challenge for 2007 was to figure out how to make it work without bleeding me dry.

(3) Sell a Product This Year -- This goal is related to (1) but tests different hypotheses:: Will people buy something I've made? and Will I like making and selling stuff more than I like writing and design? In retrospect, I can see now that goals (1) and (3) are really about choosing a career path. I could be a writer / craftsman of some kind working on the behalf of other people, or I could become more own enterprise and apply my skills on my own behalf. Which will it be?

Three Goals Evaluated

So how did I do?

1. In terms of committing to being a writer / maker, I haven't been successful in the commercial sense. I haven't published an article, written a book, or made money through pure design. I have, however, continued to work on and improve my website, writing articles and making things that have continued to amuse myself and a few others on the Internet. And because I've done this, it's been easier for the right people to stumble upon my website. I am starting to get more work from website-based referrals, and I could see this could go somewhere. The main hurdles are managing my business development activities and finding good people to share the workload.

   Regarding biz dev, I've emailed a lot of people this year, and I've not followed up on several promising leads because they got buried by other projects. From a relationship management perspective, I would score a big fat C minus. It's a huge challenge for me to just keep track of everyone and still actually have time to do paying work. Each personal interaction I take uses up at least 15 minutes, though the average is probably something like 30 minutes.

   Regarding finding good people to work with, I had some success in meeting some good people this year through the World of Warcraft Guild Experiment, and I made a referral that happily worked out for both parties. There is much additional work that can be done in this area, for example the Freelance Network that is still on the launchpad, ready to attract a few good collaborators and co-schemers.

   How about the question of identity? I've only lately realized that I would like to be meeting interesting people and documenting their stories, sort of like a tinker, plying my design work from city to city while collecting stories and songs. In a way the blog allows me to do that, but I'd like to see where it can go.

2. The problems I face in (1) are part of the rationale for forming a sustainable social network. Here, "sustainable" means "self-maintaining". The ideal network exists to empower and energize all who meaningfully participate in its activities. Most social networking groups I've been a part of have either been (1) pretty flat or (2) a job in itself with its own agenda. Since I am finding I have less and less time, I want to make something that rewards me in exactly the way I need for every hour I put into it, guaranteed. The WoW Guild was a flawed experiment in that it required a lot of energy to maintain. While the guild still exists, we haven't gotten together for some time.

   Despite the lack of a clear win in creating a sustainable network, the socializing itself has been successful. I've met a lot of people, and I'm involved in more groups both online and offline. It has led to a feeling of contentment that I haven't had in quite some time, and I am truly blessed to have met so many interesting people. It has transformed my sense of purpose, because I recognized that I felt much happier when I applied my skills to express what I personally value. And what I value are moments of inspiration and epiphany, when someone realizes that an entire world of possibility has suddenly opened to them. I'd like to continue doing that.

3. And this brings me to my last goal, selling a product as a way of applying my skills to create packaged ideas that can be physically shipped to people. I love packaging almost as much as I like making sense of things, the yin of the experience intertwined with the yang of an executable idea. I was also enamored of the idea of creating a self-running design-make-sell-ship-profit business after reading Tim Ferriss' book The Four Hour Work Week. This is a good example, incidentally, how doing something new can yield surprisingly benefits. I had reviewed the book because it was the first "advance copy" anyone had ever offered to send me. It turned out to be quite an interesting and inspiring read, and it's changed my outlook on what I could be doing with my life. As a direct result, one of my major goals for 2010 is to be completely mobile, so I can afford to work anywhere in the world at the drop of a whim. Ferriss' blog is awesome, BTW. He's not a spectator in life; he's a rare combination of teacher AND doer.

   Incidentally, for all of you waiting for the Pre-Printed Emergent Task Planner Pads to go out, we are finally ready to start shipping them throughout the domestic United States. When I get back from San Jose, we'll send an email blast out. One lucky person actually asked about them before I left, and I sent them to the secret preorder testing page, so hopefully they have received their pad order by now. Therefore, I can actually check off this goal from the list. Woo hoo! After we fulfill the pre-orders, the store will open up to the general public.

So out of those three goals, I have technically met just the last one. The reason that I met the last goal was that it was actually concrete: you either have shipped a product, or you haven't. That really made all the difference. I should have known better, I suppose, since I am a fan of concrete goals, but on the other hand my other "goals" turned out to be a series of questions:

Q. Am I comfortable calling myself a writer/maker?
A: Yes. Finally.

Q. Can I make a living from it?
A: I don't know. Selling my design work as product, writing books, and continuing to blog as inclusively as possible seem to be the direction that's working, so I'll stick with it. Expanding into products, decoupling myself from the supply chain, and being able to live anywhere will help make it possible.

Q. Is a network of awesome people part of the plan?
A. Yes. That's the whole point, to meet, scheme with, and be around awesome people to do great things.

Review Days Reviewed

The Groundhog Day Resolution system itself has, more or less, worked out. It helped that I entered the dates into Google Calendar ahead of time so I would get a reminder, and I never forgot which day I was supposed to reflect. That might be the best part of the system.

The main problems I had with the system, as currently implemented, have to do with frequency, concreteness, and maintaining clarity.

• Once a month is frequent enough to be aware of your goals, but it isn't frequent enough to make them part of your daily continuity. If you're a dilligent practitioner of Getting Things Done, you know the importance of the weekly review in making sure your projects are moving forward. With a whole 4 weeks between Groundhog Day Review Days, you are just not going to maintain the same pacing. This was sort of by design; as I didn't want my goals to be more work for me that I would have to track on top of my every-day work. In other words, they were "bonus" goals.

• Some of the most personally satisfyiing things I did this year, like Getting Up at a Regular Time (still doing it) and Decoding the Mysteries of the Gym (still doing that too, having achieved the level of "cardiovascular fatness" without losing weight) were not even on my list. I think there should be some way of tracking these bonus accomplishments within the system, but there is no formalized record keeping methodology. Corrie Haffly's Monthly Goal Tracker Forms are the closest thing there is to an "officially-approved" form, and who can say no to a cheering cartoon groundhog? Only heartless bastards, that's who! :-)

• About halfway through the year I hit the goal doldrums, and had to remind myself why I even had these goals in the first place. So midway through the year, it probably is not a bad idea to have a goal re-assessment day around 7/7 to infuse new energy into the system. I'm not sure what it was; perhaps the onset of summer had me distracted.

So sometime between now and February 2nd, I'll hopefully be working on a version 2.0 of Groundhog Day Resolutions, complete with new forms and writeups. You can probably guess that this might be a second product to put together. I'll probably adapt the old Concrete Goals Tracker for New Year's Resolutions methodology, combined perhaps with some interesting props.

So that's it for the year. Practitioners of Groundhog Day Resolutions have the rest of the year off for their resolution keeping, because we're busy with the holidays and the aftermath of closing out the year. I hope everyone had a good year.

Happy 2008!

Past Posts on Groundhog Resolutions Day

• Original Post and Rationalization - February 2nd
• GHDRRD #1 - March 3 Review
• GHDRRD #2 - April 4 Review
• GHDRRD #3 - May 5 Review
• GHDRRD #4 - June 6 Review
• GHDRRD #5 - July 7 Review
• GHDRRD #6 - August 8 Review
• GHDRRD #7 - September 9 Review
• GHDRRD #8 - October 10 Review
• GHDRRD #9 - November 11 Review

Ground Hog Day Resolution Review Day 9: Remembrance

It's 11/11, Veteran's Day here in the United States. It's also Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day, the day in which I do what amounts to a monthly review of my year's resolutions. The difference is that I set my resolutions on February 2nd, and review them on 3/3, 4/4, 5/5, etc.

I have been reflecting quite a bit on focus and determination these past few weeks, and this reminds me today of the men and women who get things done in wartime. I am not so bubble headed to compare my life, soft as it is, to what soldiers do for their countries, but I do draw inspiration from their dedication and action. There is a choice to do, and then there is commitment and follow through. A lot of what they do will never be fully appreciated by people like me, as I have no personal reference point to truly understand. It is also sobering to thing that I have the luxury of being a procrastinator---and even writing about it---because of the sacrifices others have made to keep our society free. And beyond our veterans, I think of the countless generations of people who uprooted their lives to emigrate, daring to dream big for themselves and their children, to build cities and families and ultimately create this place that is worth fighting and dying for. In the light of these reflections, as I am reflecting tonight, my to do list suddenly seems rather small and insignificant.

Still, I can accept that my to do list is my mission, and though it is a very small part of a very large world, I also know that it's my role to play on the world stage. It's a bit part, but I'm contributing to the greater cause just by continuing to do my thing, and to doing it as well as I can. Every task is part of the greater effort to move our collective lives forward, to maintain our personal liberties, and to keep our dreams alive. The trick, I find, is maintaining my momentum by keeping the energy supply lines flowing (logistics), and recognizing that every small step taken is a step toward the goal (morale).

I am a bit tired and weary of the time it's taken to make progress on just my three goals for the year: I'd hoped to have the Pre-Printed Emergent Task Planner Pads shipped by now, but they have not. This is a project that is close, but not yet closed. There's one final push to make, but my supply of energy is spread thin across many fronts, and therefore my movements must be cautious lest one of them gives way. But if I'm too cautious, my window of opportunity will close (and there are many other battles to engage, such as updating all my forms and getting the 2008-2009 calendars out) that are competing for time.

Reviewing Last Month's Goals

Last month I was not happy with the progress I was making on the ETP pads. They are soooo close, but frankly they have been backburnered several times due to a couple major projects, one of which is just kicking off for the entire next year. The first project was actually a bit of UI design work for internal use by the United Nations Development Program Agency, which was quite an interesting project. The project I have going on right now is an interactive space exhibit design for a Holocaust museum, as a member of a small team. Because I greatly value the mission of both these clients, I don't feel so bad about not making as much progress as I'd have liked, but I do need to remember that one project does not displace the others; it's so easy to choose the "important" over the "would be nice to do" projects, because we essentially are choosing not to prioritize for ourselves. And that's the same as not choosing at all. This is a dangerous, reactionary attitude...and it's easy to fall into.

That said, let's review my goals for the last time before final check-in on December 12:

• Making Something and Selling It --- The Emergent Task Planner Pads. I did create the pack-in instruction sheet, but I don't have it printed. Once printed, it's a matter of sending out the final costs via email, getting the money in through PayPal, printing labels, having a packing party, and then mailing everything out. This is actually a pretty significant chunk of work. Our production is split into two locations at the moment, which is part of the challenge.

• Building a Social Network --- Looking back, I have not actually created a formal network, but I certainly do know more people, and I have a clearer idea of how to create one. I think I can safely close this resolution in spirit, and plan for next year's goal of establishing more of a community infrastructure. Now that I've finally transitioned from WordPress to Expression Engine, I have the technical web underpinnings for adding the integrated forum, wiki, and topic-specific blogs to the mix here at davidseah.com. I'm looking forward to it.

There are a few new goals too for 2008, but I'm not going to even worry about them until next year.

So that's it for the review. On January 1st, I'd like to have a tweaked version of Groundhogs Day Resolutions structured and ready to go. There were many things that worked about this, and a few things that didn't. For example, the monthly review cycle has forced me to keep some continuity on my goals, and I've found that maintaining any continuity at all---that is, being able to follow the narrative of an activity---is a wonderful thing when it comes to being creative. What hasn't work so well is the last few months of goals; real work has displaced some of them, and the original focus has also been lost. I would say a mid-season review-and-purge of goals is a necessary addition to the system. Or, perhaps a year is far too much time to allocate to your goals.

Check in on December 12 for the Groundhog Day Resolutions Final Review!

Past Posts on Groundhog Resolutions Day

• Original Post and Rationalization - February 2nd
• GHDRRD #1 - March 3 Review
• GHDRRD #2 - April 4 Review
• GHDRRD #3 - May 5 Review
• GHDRRD #4 - June 6 Review
• GHDRRD #5 - July 7 Review
• GHDRRD #6 - August 8 Review
• GHDRRD #7 - September 9 Review
• GHDRRD #8 - October 10 Review

Ground Hog Day Resolution Review Day 8

Goodness, it is already Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day, October 10th! That's 10/10. There's just two more review days, on 11/11 and 12/12, before we close out the year and figure out whether all this Groundhog mojo will have been worth it.

For those of you unfamiliar with the Groundhog Day Resolutions Concept, it goes something like this: forget January 1st (you're hung over anyway) and set your resolutions on February 2nd. Then follow through and check every month and a day until December 12. You can read about the original ideas in the original post and various followups (there is an index of posts at the bottom of this article).

1. Make Money from Writing and Making Stuff

I haven't made any progress with regards to any of the marketing work that I should be doing. Partly this is because I'm booked out to November 2008 with projects. I also appear to have picked up another long-term client that is, in many ways, an ideal combination of challenge, global scope, and personality.

So now, I'm less worried about marketing and more concerned about getting my website switched over the Expression Engine. There is a LOT that I'd like to write about that falls outside what I usually write about here.

My greatest challenge is still time management and, I am belatedly realizing, learning how to focus.

2. Build a Sustainable Social Network

Last month, I became aware that I'd stabilized some social structures. This month, I'm really starting to feel that it's starting to fall into place. Maybe the most important realization of all was discovering that I actually have a best friend to hang out with again, and I hadn't even really noticed. There is a tremendous sense of comfort that arises from that.

At the same time, I'm feeling a wee bit overextended. I am continuing to have problems managing contacts and relationships because of the number of things that are going on. Again, I'm back to managing and prioritizing my time and energy.

3. Sell a Product This Year

I thought we'd have shipped the Emergent Task Planner Pads by now, but we had to take them back to be shrinkwrapped; this makes shipping them much easier, and it's a better value to the customer too.

I did register my LLC, which is The David Seah Group. Scares the bejesus out of me. I have to get all that infrastructure into place now.

For Next Month

• The biggest goal on my mind is shipping those ETP pads. It's taking a long time, and it's really all my fault. I have to write up the pack-in sheet that explains how to use the pads, and then we should be ready to ship.

• The mix of project-related and social networking activities I'm doing is pretty new, and learning how to balance that with getting things done is taking some time. The general issue is that I have not been mindful of how I am spending my time, whimsically doing whatever seems to be worth doing from moment to moment. I have not been focused at all.

• bonus goal: I'm starting month 4 of going to the gym practically every day, though my morning routine has been disrupted somewhat and I haven't been going quite as regularly as I would like. I'm still amazed at how much cheaper going to the gym is than going to Starbucks is.

• new goal: I actually took my suit to the tailor to have it adjusted to fit better. In January 2008 I'm hoping to be a little more outwardly put together, since I will be in better physical condition and can wear nicer clothes that fit.

So that's it for this month. I feel like the process is losing steam, but overall I can say that at least there IS progress being made.

PAST POSTS ON GROUNDHOG DAY RESOLUTIONS AND REVIEW

• Original Post and Rationalization - February 2nd
• GHDRRD #1 - March 3
• GHDRRD #2 - April 4
• GHDRRD #3 - May 5
• GHDRRD #4 - June 6
• GHDRRD #5 - July 7
• GHDRRD #6 - August 8
• GHDRRD #7 - September 9

Ground Hog Day Resolutions Review Day 7

Yes, it's that time again: Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day. I almost forgot about it, but fortunately I had entered all the days into Google Calendar and I got the reminder last night.

The quick recap for those unfamiliar with the Groundhog Day Resolutions Concept: Forget January 1st, and set your resolutions on February 2nd. Then follow through and check every month and a day until December 12. This is the first year I've tried this, and it's kind of gratifying to look back and see what progress has been made.

Rather than go into a long-winded explanation of what's been going on, I'll just recap each statement; you can read about the original ideas in the original post and various followups (there is an index of posts at the bottom of this article).

1. Make Money from Writing and Making Stuff

The general idea is to shift from pure services and become an original content creator, deriving the bulk of my income from my own work. This ties into a new goal I established this month: to be completely mobile by 2010, so I can go to where the interesting projects and people are in the world. There's so much world to experience, it drives me nuts. I've also been inspired again by Tim Ferriss' continuing adventures, which you can follow on his mind-bogglingly excellent tip blog.

The "whiffed" (missed) goals I have decided probably weren't as important as I thought. I still do need to transition to Expression Engine, because my current blog structure feels very constraining, and I think EE's system will be a welcome improvement.

I actually have been booked for the remainder of the year, and probably a good chunk of next year, so my big challenge will be actually time management. The nature of the projects are steeped in writing (essentially, analysis) and making stuff (software, basically). It's kind of what I was doing before, but more challenging and therefore interesting. I will be learning a lot that I can proceduralize and redevelop into new things.

2. Build a Sustainable Social Network

It feels like I've finally stabilzed a few social structures over the past month, though I am uncertain about my level of commitment to them. This uncertainty arises from the amount of energy that I receive back. I actually feel a little "overdrawn" in terms of my social energy and time, so I need to hole up and regenerate. Also on my mind is the continuing search for suitable partners, in terms both of romance and in working mission. In an ideal world, it would be the same person, but I am not sure how to go about finding this. I may write about some of the challenges I'm facing in the coming months, as I haven't yet come across a really good explanation of the process.

I do need to get off my ass and resurrect the May goal of creating the co-schemer / freelancer list...this is pretty important to me, and is related to my overall search strategy of being able to connect people. I'd like to be connected too, of course, and I've come to believe that all it will take is someone standing up and taking names. I guess that will be me. Watch for a post in the near future.

3. Sell a Product This Year

It's taken a while, but the Emergent Task Planner Pads have finally gone to press. Related tasks: forming an LLC, figuring out the design-to-fulfillment chain, and starting to think like an actual business entity instead of some guy working out of his basement office in New Hampshire.

This goal relates closely to #1, and there are actually some new deadlines in place. If last year was any indication, the last months of the year are when people start thinking about planning for next year, so having pre-printed versions of the Compact Calendar, perhaps a full-year planner product, and goodness knows what else could be nice product to have. Now that some of the design-to-fulfillment workflow is in place, I can start to automate the process and shorten the cycle. While I was at the printer, it struck me that there's quite a lot of custom print work I can do beyond pads, and working with a local printer could be a lot of fun. Apparently there is a thing that paper manufacturers create called a paper library, which is a sampler of all the paper stock with printing examples. I was so excited I thought I would faint. This might sound crazy, but I have the ability to touch any material and instantly envision something I could make from it that "respects" it. Putting that into practice would kick ass.

For Next Month

We're in the home stretch, with only 3 more review periods before the GHD year comes to an end.

• The biggest goal on my mind is shipping those ETP pads and getting feedback from the brave souls who have taken a chance on the product. The second goal is to establish the LLC (I'm thinking of calling it "The David Seah Group", which scares the crap out of me because I would have to grow into that) and getting the online ordering and fulfillment automated.

• I'm not so concerned about #1, as the printing goal sort of takes care of that.

• Regarding #2, I do need to gather a group of like-minded people with skills, just so we know who we are. I've done some of this already privately, but there are so many cool people I've been contacted by that I feel the need to organize them into some kind of directory of awesomeness. Everyone has a skill and a story that they can contribute to the pool.

• A bonus goal that wasn't even on my list was going to the gym...I've been going for two months now, and am likely to continue doing so because I have been feeling stronger and---I admit this doesn't make much sense, but it's true---breathing more enthusiastically...maybe it's a result of the improved cardiovascular endurance. The next challenge that isn't part of my GHDRs is to systematically lose weight.

So that's it for this month...now, back to work! Time for dreaming will have to come later.

PAST POSTS ON GROUNDHOG DAY RESOLUTIONS AND REVIEW

• Original Post and Rationalization - February 2nd
• GHDRRD #1 - March 3
• GHDRRD #2 - April 4
• GHDRRD #3 - May 5
• GHDRRD #4 - June 6
• GHDRRD #5 - July 7
• GHDRRD #6 - August 8

Mysteries of the Gym, Part V: Two Months Later

It's hard for me to believe, but it's been two months since I started going to the gym. And it's even harder to believe that I actually enjoy it! Read onward for the final chapter in this two-month experiment.

Here's a quick recap of the past 4 posts I'd made on the gym experience:

• The First Day: Although joining the gym seems expensive, I realize that going to Starbucks every morning actually costs more for less benefit. When I factor the common health insurance benefit (about $200 a year), the first year ends up being $300 invested in my health. After the first year, the cost drops to a ludicrously cheap $40/year. Convinced but highly self-conscious, I research what to wear so I don't look like a dork. I also pay an additional $99 for eight 1-hour training sessions from a club trainer. The first week is largely about using the machines in the cardio room: the stairmaster, the stepper, the elliptical, the treadmill, and the stationary bike. The stepper I find particularly mesmerizing, though I last all of 2 minutes on it before staggering off.

• The First Week: I'd heard that the gym is deathly boring, and so I purchased my first iPod (a sleek 8GB Nano) to load up with podcasts. To my surprise, I discover that I don't even want to listen to them, as there are plenty of new experiences to maintain my interest. For one thing, I find the heart rate monitor to be invaluable in gaging my level of workout, and correlating that number with the awareness of my own body stress level is very interesting. I become aware that my body has things to teach me, now that I am actively listening to it.

• The Second Week: Everything that I had feared had not come to pass, these bogeymen being boredom, frustration at my lack of progress, social embarrassment, and a feeling of failure. Instead, I feel good about having gone nearly every day of the week and putting in the time to sweat. Expending energy feels good. I've also learned how to tell when my body is lying to me and when it's telling the truth. For example, the body's claim of "ok, I'm tired, let's stop" can be easily ignored because the body has incredible reserves; just slow down a bit, and speed up again once the complaining stops. Amazing.

• The First Month: I am pretty convinced that I like going to the gym every morning. For one thing, it helps maintain the momentum of the day, which is kicked off by meeting up with a growing group of friends and acquaintances at the local coffee shop. Secondly, there are so many things to do at the gym that I can't foresee getting bored for some time. Not only are there new muscles to test and develop, but there just isn't enough time to do everything you want. In this respect, the gym experience reminds me of the level grind in World of Warcraft. The difference is that the character you're working to improve is you, and that's just awesome.

Which brings me to today, the day after Labor Day here in the United States. I'd started my gym regimen just before the Independence Day holiday, and it was interesting to look back and see what kind of progress I've made.

CARDIOVASCULAR ENDURANCE

When I started two months ago, maintaining my heart rate around 135-140 BPM on the treadmill was about what I could do without starting to feel winded. I would do about 15 minutes on the elliptical, followed by 15-25 more minutes on the treadmill.

At around the one month mark, I started getting a little bored by the elliptical and treadmill. I realized that this was because I was now able to maintain that 140 BPM rate without really trying anymore. I was very conscious about how hard my body was adapting to the increased demands being placed on it, and at the one-month mark it seemed that my body had adapted itself to take it.

I started to increase my exercise in short bursts to elevate my heart rate by 5-10 BPM. I found that just a short 10-15 burst was sufficient to get the body to raise the heart rate, but it took several minutes to fall back to pre-burst levels. Fascinating. I started setting BPM targets for the week, using the handy age versus heartrate recommendations charts that are printed right on the machines. I'm about 40 years old, and the 80% cardio rate is about 145 BPM depending on which machine I'm on.

Over the next couple weeks, I started to noticed that I could maintain burst levels for longer periods of time, and that I didn't seem to notice any throbbing in my head or running out of breath. I increased my BPM target by about 5 every week, using the heart rate monitor to set my pacing and paying very careful attention to my breathing rhythm while keeping extremely alert for any twinges or stresses whatsoever internally. I didn't want to blow a blood vessel. I would periodically look in a mirror to check my eyes to see if I saw any increased redness there too. I also made sure to work up slowly to the BPM target over several minutes, and would take the same number of minutes to cool down back to a relatively low 135BPM before getting off the machine.

ASIDE: The prudent thing to do would have been to see a doctor first and get my blood pressure tested, but the last time I'd gone I discovered that my blood pressure was actually surprisingly low, as were my cholesterol levels so I figured I was probably OK. :END ASIDE

It was also around this time that I discovered that I really did like The Stepper. This is a machine that bounces you up and down in a leg-bumping upright position. It's about as brutal as the automatic stair-climbing machine, except it is self-paced. It's this self-pacing feature that I like, because it allows me to quickly vary my level of challenge instantaneously. The Stepper I'm using measures your challenge level in terms of "building floors climbed per minute". At a moderate rate of about 7-8 floors per minute, this machine burns 1000 calories an hour. At about 10 floors per minute, it burns 1200 calories per hour. I was able to last a whole 10 minutes before staggering off, and I arbitrarily set a target of being able to do 100 floors in 10 minutes as my minimum Stepper regimen in the morning before switching to something easier.

The mystique of the Stepper continued to haunt me, so on days I was feeling particularly fresh I pushed the time to 15 minutes and 20 minutes; this latter a major milestone, because one of the Steppers uses this as its default workout length. Yesterday, as a kind of two month gym graduation exercise, I was able to stay on the machine for 42 minutes, with an average heart BPM of about 165, burning about 750 calories. And when I got off the machine, I wasn't totally wiped out. In fact, I felt kick-ass!

I've noticed that my endurance and stamina has increased noticeably, particularly during this year's summer of helping friends move. I didn't get tired. I had learned to pace my energy through the machine conditioning, and so long as I drank enough water and had some chocolate to nibble on, I was able to maintain pace without really feeling the need to stop. At the end of these moving days, I would feel tired, but it wasn't the debilitating "I'm going to die" tiredness that I'd had in the past. Pretty darn cool.

WEIGHT CHANGES, STRENGTH TRAINING

Weight loss, while desirable, wasn't my main motivation. I figured that if I could learn to like the gym and develop a habit, then weight loss would start to happen as a natural side effect. While I did lose about 10 pounds the first two weeks, the drop hasn't continued. I have, however, gotten stronger due to the weight training introduction we did at around the two week mark. Here are some things I've noticed lately:

• I was carrying a basket of laundry downstairs, and noticed that I could swing it around more gracefully without colliding into that post at the bottom landing.

• I had to reach for something on a high shelf, and noticed that when I stood up on my toes I could go a little higher and hold the position longer.

• The cat seems lighter, though I know he is not.

• I played volleyball in the park for the first time, and my whole body seems to know how to move.

The amount of weight I am pushing around while doing the resistance training has also risen by about 30%. My leg strength is probably the most noticeable, as I'm leg pressing 220 pounds now (I've always had very good leg strength). My upper body is considerably flabbier, but my shoulders and back no longer have that "half-inflated" feeling that I didn't know was bothering. The muscles back there have been activated, which has resulted in slightly-improved posture.

After starting with the muscle group machines in the "beginning weight training" machine room, I expressed some boredom with these and was shown other machines that use slightly different mechanics. Unlike the beginning machines, the other ones tend to require more balance because the arm and leg motions are not locked together. For example, consider the "lat pulldown", a motion that challenges your side-back muscles to pull down from the top of your head to your chest. In the beginning machine, the motion is equally shared because you grasp a single bar with both hands. In the more "advanced" machine, each arm moves independently. I found this required more concentration and tension in my "core". We also covered individual muscle machines, like bicep curlers and so forth, but I actually found these pretty boring. My trainer told me to at least do the muscle group exercises (chest press, shoulder press, lat pulldown, leg press) regularly. It's ok to add in the other exercises as I see fit at the stage I am at now. The way I can tell if a machine is multiple-muscle or single-muscle is to count the number of joints I'm moving: if more than one is working, it's a muscle group.

At around the 5th week, I mentioned to my trainer that I felt like I had things to do for my legs, arms, shoulder, and chest, but the middle part felt like it wasn't doing much. I had found the core-building medicine ball exercises really dull, and hadn't been doing them. So, I got introduced to a few additional machines that made working the core easier for me:

• A bench that you can use to arch your back up (the motion reminds me of a dolphin jumping out of the water)
• A twisting weight machine
• The various abdominal crunch machines
• The leg crunch stand, where you hold yourself up by your arms and pull your legs up. I keep sinking, though, so I think I need to wait until my shoulder strength is up by doing "dips".

What I've come away with is that there are hundreds of muscles that work in different directions and apply different forces. Right now, I'm focused on just figuring out where the muscles are, and increasing my strength in what I guess could be called "common motions". I can see the appeal of bodybuilding now; the body is incredibly adaptable. Being able to tune your body so it does what you want is one of the coolest things you can possibly do, because you can bring that elevated level of physical competence with you wherever you go. I am presuming, of course, that you're also working your brain at the same time to create the total package. Awesome.

OTHER LESSONS LEARNED

In addition to the physical insights, I've learned quite a bit about habit forming, endurance, and the connection between an active body and an active mind. I'll likely talk about these sometime in the future, particularly the idea of designing habit-building safaris for those challenging self-improvement projects.

Another principle that I've become reacquainted with is that of the continuum of resistance that is a prerequisite for developing greater strength and training to higher levels of ability. However, if you don't have an immediate feedback mechanism to gauge your instantaneous level of effort, the exercise feels a little pointless to the ever-fickle brain. For the cardiovascular work, the key mechanisms are heart rate monitoring and the 30 minute minimum time. The qualitative feedback mechanism is the experienced level of exhaustion. For the weight training, it's the amount of weight lifted and the number of full sets of repetitions completed, qualitatively reinforced by the soreness of muscle building in the following day.

CONCLUSION

The gym is cool. I should have done this a long time ago. It would not have been possible for me if I hadn't already formed a habit of waking up and going to the coffee shop every morning (ongoing since January). And of course, I am fortunate that I am a freelancer, and can afford to set my hours accordingly.

While weight loss is not really occurring, it appears that I am slowly sliming down and getting stronger. Pants are even fitting a little better. And just the other day, I reached down to scratch my butt and encountered an actual muscle that had apparently formed over the past 8 weeks. I was surprised and gratified in the same way one might be when happening upon a crisp 10 dollar bill hidden in a pile of old receipts.

My next habit-building safari may be to incorporate healthier and more regular eating into my daily regimen so I can actually lose more body fat. I'm currently stuck at 215lbs right now. My trainer says that with my body type, I may not actually drop that much if I continue to develop strength; apparently I have the power-lifter body type that builds muscle with the abandon with which I slather mayonnaise tomato sandwiches. Personally, I was hoping to discover my inner Chow Yun Fat, but I guess I am destined to forever be Odd Job.

Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day 6

Yes, it's that time again: Groundhog Day Resolution Review Day! This is the extended format version of new year's resolutions, diddled a bit to make them a little more workable with my oh-so-modern life. You can read about the idea's genesis in detail if you like, but the basic idea is this:

• January 1st is a terrible day to do New Years Resolutions. We're all hungover, and got a whole month of catching up to do. February 2nd, now there's a day that needs a boost.

• New Years Resolutions fail because we don't follow up on them. So why not designate regular easy-to-remember days like 2/2, 3/3, 4/4, and so forth?

I've been putting myself through the process this year to get a feel for what works and what doesn't. I haven't yet made a nifty download for this, but fellow form productivista Corrie Haffly has her awesome Monthly Goal Trackers. There are a few people scattered across the Internet who are also trying this out, so ROCK ON.

Anyway, it's time to catch up and figure out how badly I've been blowing my resolutions.

BLOWN ACTIONS

I've been noticing that as the months go by, I've been adhering less and less to the specific goals, but overall I've been following the spirit of my GHD resolutions. I had deliberately picked (I think) just three overall goals in February:

1. Make Money from Writing and Making Stuff
2. Build a Sustainable Social Network
3. Sell a Product This Year

In May I started to realize that I was not making deliberate progress toward fulfilling these goals, so I started setting action items. Here's the chain of them:

1. Make Money from Writing and Making Stuff

2. Build a Sustainable Social Network

3. Sell a Product This Year

I can see that many tasks just didn't get done, so that's not too good. However, overall I've incrementally moved just a little closer to fulfilling my resolutions. That's something to feel good about, though I probably wouldn't be that LOUD about it :-)

GENERAL TRENDS

I've noticed that while my planned actions didn't necessarily get done, I think just having these thoughts on my mind has helps fit other opportunities to my needs.

• The Emergent Task Planner sheets are going to get printed, and they'll be sold. That's going to happen. I've just been slowly plugging away at it.

• The Social Networking actually has been going well for me personally. However, as I privately suspected it might, the World of Warcraft Business Networking started out strong, but has dwindled. I haven't been putting the energy into running the guild as a "primary leisure activity". However, I have made a few new friends through it, which is great! I've also discovered that my personal social network has expanded to include the coffee shop as a kind of spiritual anchor. I would never have guessed this would happen, but I am getting to know the people that are there every day, and they are real people with interesting lives, troubles, challenges...just workin' to get by, working for a better life the best they know how. Getting back in touch with that has been important to me. It gives me perspective.

  I've also come to realize that I am both craving responsibility while pushing it away. I like being responsible for things, but I hate being drained of my energy. I'm also afraid of wasting people's time (including mine) by trying new relationships and not seeing them work. This is a poor attitude...best to wade in and make what sense you can. You can't let the possibility of something being disappointing prevent you from trying. I tend to try to think of ways to maximize success before starting something, but all that seems to ever get me is a fine coating of cat hair across the back of my pants, impressed upon my backside by the couch.

• As far as Making Money from Writing and Making Things, this has been reframed as a growing sureness of my identity as a designer. The more things I've written and made, the more easily it is to see what's made me happy and what keeps me fulfilled. My challenge is to keep chipping away at the mountain of tasks and stay energized.

SPECIFIC ACTIONS

I'll keep this short and sweet:

• Print Pads! Ship Them!
• One New Statement on the Website that Clarifies My Design Work!
• Start a bunch of New Working and Personal Relationships. See What Happens.

If you'd like to read about the past Groundhog Day Resolution Review Days, click below!

• Original Post and Rationalization
• GHDRRD #1
• GHDRRD #2
• GHDRRD #3
• GHDRRD #4
• GHDRRD #5

Lessons from the Gym, Part IV

I'm coming to the end of my first full month of going to the gym every morning, and I'm pleased to say that I haven't yet exploded, died of boredom, or gotten slapped by female club members for looking at their backsides. And I even enjoy going to the gym in the morning now. The experience is actually reminding me a little bit of the online role-playing game World of Warcraft in that there are an astonishing number of things to do to improve your character. At the gym, the character you're improving is you.

NUANCES OF THE BODY

When I first started going to the gym (you can read about this in part 1, part 2, and part 3), my initial impression was that there were only a few things you could do there:

1. Cardio
2. Weight Training
3. Classes
4. Basketball or Boxing

That is not a particularly impressive feature list, and I was hoping that the sheer novelty of exercise would be enough for me to get hooked somehow. In hindsight, I can see that this was my mind, not my body, making the assessment. My mind is thinking, "Hey, what interesting things can be done for my intellectual amusement? Oh, just those 4 things."

As it turns out, the rest of my body has found plenty of stimulation in just the cardio room. Every one of the machines there provides a different physical experience. The Stepper machine, which I used to hate, is actually a lot of fun because it reminds me of when I was a kid standing on the pedals of my my single-speed bike, flying up a hill as fast as I could. The various vintages of Elliptical machines all have slightly different motions. The feeling of expending energy, sweating, and pacing myself at a sustainable level is surprisingly enjoyable. My mind shuts off, and I feel more grounded with the world. It's really weird!

Also, I'm becoming aware of the number of muscles in my body. Each muscle has its own feel and use, and I'm enjoying the process of figuring out how my body works through the use of these various machines. It's like a giant puzzle!

WEIGHT TRAINING

I also started the resistance training, starting off with four machines that worked groups of major muscles:

• the chest press - pushing straight out from the chest
• the shoulder press - pushing straight up from the shoulders
• the lat pulldown - pulling straight down to the chest
• the leg press - pushing out from the legs

These apparently are exercises I should do every day after warming up, though I find them a bit boring except for the lat pulldown, which just feels good. After working with the basic four, the trainer introduced me to more specific machines the isolate specific muscles:

• pectoral fly - closing your arms kind of like a book
• bicep and tricep - I forget the exact name, but it works the back and front muscles of your arms. Two machines.
• leg extensions - Same thing, except for the front and back of your legs
• Hip abductors - for the inside and outside of your legs.

I mentioned to the trainer that I wasn't really enjoying any of these machines, so today he showed me some machines that worked slightly differently. It was in a different part of the club, and the machines seemed targeted toward people who were more advanced in their body strength training. For one thing, the machines tended to be clustered in groups that worked the same muscles in slightly different ways. Also, these machines had independent arm motions and required a bit more concentration to do things right. The trainer showed me equivalents for the various machines I had been using before, so now I have some variations to experience.

I also was introduced to a couple other benches that worked my back and front "core" areas. One of them allowed me to do some kind of crunch while suspending myself in the air with my arms. This one was kind of fun, but my upper body strength is a little weak, so I kept sagging lower and lower. The other bench locked my lower legs while facing forward and down, and straightening my back caused my entire upper body to rise. I think this works the lower back. This one I liked because it reminded me of dolphins bursting out of the water.

OVERALL PROGRESS

I've lost about 10 pounds since starting, and my cardiovascular endurance is improved considerably. I'm still pretty flabby, but overall I am feeling a little stronger and looking a tad thinner. I think what I am enjoying the most is just getting sweaty in the morning and getting the heart rate up. I get sleepy afterwards.

One thing I've noticed is that I'm sleeping more. I may have been overdoing it slightly, so I'm pushing myself less. I've also been going to sleep too late every night, so when I go to the gym I'm slightly under-rested, which probably is why I tend to nap afterwards.

I'm still figuring out the pacing of things, and trying to get used to the weight training part. At the very least, I do know I like the 30 minutes of cardio in the morning, listening to music. I've tried listening to some podcasts, but they don't really help keep me moving the way regular music does. There is one exception: Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. It has the energy and the good humor that keeps me engaged.

Lessons from the Gym, Part III

I started going to a local health club about two weeks ago, with the hypothesis that I could build this on top of my waking up early experiment. The surprising result of the waking up early experiment was that it had originally failed after two weeks, but the act of going through the exercise had allowed me to discover the factor that was most effective: regular early morning social interaction. It makes sense in hindsight, as I've come to recognize that I'm more motivated by people these days than concepts. Once I focused on the people I was talking to in the morning rather than planning, or merely trying to establish the mechanical rhythm of wakefulness, everything seemed to align. So now, my morning routine reminds me a lot of waiting for the school bus with my "bus stop friends", grabbing a few minutes before work to just chill and catch up on the events of the day. I would never have guessed that this was what I needed, but there ya go. The journey is the reward, and it's the experience that defines the journey step-by-step.

Using Momentum

One principle I follow in both graphical user interface (GUI) design and teaching is to provide choice of action in the immediate context where a choice will make all the difference. In GUI design, this means being aware of what the user is really doing, and making sure that the most useful controls are as close as possible to the "action" part of the screen. In teaching, I'll try to help my students visualize the grand scope of what we're attempting to do, pointing out the salient details that will make a difference. Then, I will offer an immediate action for the student to take themselves where they can visibly make a change in the scenario. In both cases, I'm trying to preserve a kind of working momentum relating thought with action and observed result. I was just thinking that the same principle is applying to my gym experiment, as I'm using the momentum from being at the coffee shop every morning to carry me over to the gym. The school bus analogy works pretty well; when you're sitting outside in the early morning chatting with people, the idea of going to work isn't always that enticing, so by going to the gym I get to defer that "healthily". I chose a gym that was very convenient to the coffee shop, and this seems to be working out (no pun intended :-)

Counter Measures

As I mentioned earlier, my waking up experiment taught me a few things I didn't know about myself, and I was very curious whether the gym experience would result in the same thing as impressions built up over time. When I started the gym membership, I expected that the following would be the major challenges:

• Boredom.
• Quitting after a few weeks.
• Frustration with lack of observable progress.
• Embarrassment at my lack of physical prowess or gym-like appearance.

For each challenge, I developed a preemptive countermeasure:

• Boredom: countered by writing about the experience, and by finally buying an iPod so I could catch up on all the interesting Podcasts I was missing.
• Quitting: countered by the desire to really stick with this, as I know it's good for me. Also, realizing that I can get some money back from my self-paid health insurance. Calculating the cost relative to having coffee at Starbucks everyday, and telling myself it's about MY HEALTH puts this into perspective: I'm responsible for myself, and this trumps the impulsive desire to just be lazy. Principles have been invoked!
• Frustration: I know from prior experience that diet and exercise have observable results after only a couple of weeks, though I never stuck with the routine for very long.
• Embarrassment: I decided that being embarrassed about this was not worth it. So I'm fat and balding, big deal. The principle that comes into play is that pushing past what other people think to do something you believe in is awesome, just awesome. This is a kind of coping mechanism in a way, as I do tend to be embarrassed about my lack of social and physical grace in front of people, but the principle of just doing and saying what you think is the ideal I strive for. And so, I just go.

By coming up with the list above, I constructed the winning rational argument for joining a gym, but I can't claim the credit for the initial impulse. I never would have even thought of it if not for a friend that planted the idea in my head in just the right way.

Unexpected Lessons

I was feeling pretty cool about having pre-thought of all these things, and as a result I had the confidence to enjoy myself in unfamiliar surroundings. Paying $99 for the 8 sessions of "training" in the use of the gym facilities toward strength, cardio, and weight loss was well worth the money. The interesting thing, though, is how my actual gym experience differs from the anticipated one.

• Countering Boredom: I associate boredom with being mentally distracted and unstimulated by what I'm doing. Because I perceived the gym as being a lot of repetitive exercises that one did because "it's good for you", I thought it absolutely essential to load up programs like This American Life onto my iPod to keep my mind engaged with something. This trick works for me on long road trips; I usually get sleepy after only a couple hours on the highway, UNLESS I'm listening to an audio book. The same principle should have applied to the gym.

  What actually happened: I have in the past thought of my body as a large lump of fat, muscle, and bone. This lump had a certain caloric burning potential (the metabolic rate); to lose weight, one increases the percentage of muscle while lowering caloric intake below the metabolic rate. Over time, the calorie deficit leads to steady weight loss. In principle, this model is quite sound (it is from The Hacker's Diet, which I followed for a while). The actual gym experience has opened my eyes: Because I was so concerned about overdoing it and causing some kind of heart problem, I've been noting every little sensation of my work outs. The conclusion I've come to is that the body is a remarkably adaptive system of interconnected components, and that there is quite a lot to explore and develop. I can see how mastering one's body can develop into a fascinating hobby, one that you can bring with you on the road very easily. I think I'm hooked.

  Also surprising: I have no desire to listen to podcasts or catch up on the news while I'm working out. Instead, I'm listening to a bunch of "favorite songs" that I ended up completely by accident: I had been trying out one of the iPod functions that added the current song to the built-in "On the Go" playlist. When I listened to it to see if I was really doing it right, I found that it was very pleasant. I nuked out the songs that were "marginal favorites", and ended up with a bunch of songs that completely bypass my rational mind and impart a sense of musical pleasure. A nice side-effect is that I am loathe to stop a workout in the middle of a song, and often the next song is compelling enough that I want to keep going. "Just one more song." I'm 50% convinced that I won't have to adjust the playlist much, because I've picked songs that I really really like from a vocal, production, and compositional perspective (lyrics I usually don't hear as words). My mind is engaged, just in a different way. Maybe I'll gain the uncanny ability to compose hit pop songs in a few months! :-)

• Quitting & Frustration: I know that I have historically have not pushed myself hard physically. I remember there used to be some kind of long run we had to do in Phys Ed back in the 80s, which I absolutely hated. I was sweaty, sore, out of breath, and slower than everyone. Every single sensation cried out to me that I was doing something I didn't want to do, that I was being forced to do something uncomfortable, for no reason other than to fulfill some stupid requirement in the subtropical sun. So I avoided this sensation as much as possible. When I would feel that burning sensation or any kind of physical discomfort, I would immediate stop. This did have some unexpected side benefits: because of my highly-sensitive pain avoidance techniques, I've avoided repetitive stress injuries from typing. I had not made the distinction, though, between actual warning pain and muscles working hard.

  Fast forward to about 2001, and I going snowshoeing for the first time with some coworkers from Interactive Factory in Boston. I had imagined that this would be an hour or two walking in the snow, but to my initial dismay Jean pointed at what appeared to be a small mountain. "We're going to make a light trek up the hill there." On the second look, I realized that it wasn't actually too bad. It was just a rocky hill. I could do that for an hour.

  Around four hours later, I realized that Jean and her boyfriend were far more fit than I, and that the massive height of the hill had been hidden by a low-hanging cloud that was the same color as the sky. Still, I pushed myself along as much as possible to not slow down our small group or complain...I was determined to be a good sport about this, as it was nice of them to invite me along. I had to stop and pant periodically, but I figured it would end quickly enough, my mind calmed by the thought that the group would know how to administer CPR "just in case". When we finally got back to the B&B, I was incredibly tired, hugely enjoyed my dinner, and slept a deep dreamless sleep. The next day I was very sore, but surprisingly feeling very good physically. I could even still move. I hadn't recaptured that feeling in a long time.

  Going to the gym and doing the 30-40 minutes of cardio has helped me recapture the feeling, and I'm realizing it's balancing out something that had been missing. The body likes to consume and perspire, otherwise it just sits around unused growing stale. The resistance I feel in my muscles isn't pain, they're just sensations related to certain states of energy depletion. It was my mind that was whining and complaining, associating the sensations with unpleasant memories of PhysEd.

  Over the past few days I've been analyzing my body responses. For me, I found that the 2-minute to 5-minute period was the hardest hurdle for me to get over, but after that something changes and the muscles become conditioned to a certain sustainable pace. Once that pace is found, the body adapts and seems to lock it in for the next 5 minutes. At the 10 minute mark some actual weariness starts to set in, and an adjustment needs to be made in speed or resistance. I start feeling the sensation of energy use in parts of my body that aren't immediately in use; for example, when I'm on the treadmill, I feel it around my belly button at around the 10-minute mark.

  A very interesting breakthrough yesterday happened when I decided to just stay on the elliptical for longer; I had fallen asleep on the couch the night before and my back was feeling kind of sore, and I remember reading Bo's comment about how he had lost 40 pounds on the elliptical despite back problems. I got through the 5 minute and 10 minute mark fairly easily, having learned that my body was capable of pushing past these sensations and would be fine. At the 15 minute mark, I was starting to feel a little weary of being on the elliptical and was about to switch. Just then, the song on my iPod changed to a really long and fun-sounding "ABBA" dance remix, and I was screwed because I don't like to stop in the middle of a song (a vestigial habit from not disrupting live musical performances, I guess). At the 20 minute mark, I realized that there were probably additional thresholds to push past...could I stay on the same machine for the entire 30 minute session? So I kept at it, and kept things interesting by monitoring my heart rate. I noted that it was varying between about 140 and 150, which was a good range according to the chart. The elliptical motion had also started to remind me of running in a field when I was 6 or 7, and I would run as fast as I could to try to outrun the cat. I remembered feeling like I was just on the edge of my ability, my legs almost not keeping up with my speed. So I decided to do a small 10 second burst to see what the heart rate response would be. I was at 140 bpm, which was fairly low, and then tried moving about 50% faster for 10 seconds before dropping back down. It was a good feeling. I watched my heart rate climb over the next 30 seconds to 160, then drop down to 140 again over the next couple of minutes. Fascinating. I tried a longer burst of 30 seconds, and watched my heart rate climb to about 169, which was slightly alarming. I was carefully monitoring my heart rate and body for adverse reactions, and decided that things were nominal...I didn't feel any feelings of pressure in any blood vessels, and my heart was beating fast but I wasn't out of breath. I kept things at a lower level for several minutes, just monitoring myself. It struck me then that I had been on the elliptical for longer than I had been on any machine, and that apparently the body had more reserves than I had thought. I decided not to push my luck on the bursts that day, just keeping things at a steady pace, but it was fascinating to see the "system response" of my body to a certain level of exertion, and how I could control the amount of exertion to stay within a good range.

• Embarrassment: This had never really occurred to me before, but there are a lot of attractive women at the gym. Ordinarily I might have been very self-conscious about my own lack of outward healthiness, but the tone of the entire gym is "we're each here individually to do a job" and I'm allowed to stay in my own world. People are all shapes and sizes, but there's a common sense of shared mission. It's also encouraging to see the results of all this work, and it's strangely empowering to be in such a space where people come as they are, and work to make themselves better.

General Empowerment and Productivity.

I realized today that there's also been a mental shift in my perspective toward work. Learning to push through the 5- and 10- minute marks on the various machines to get into that self-sustaining state of mind is entirely applicable to my design work. When I'm sitting in front of the computer starting to do some work. Sometimes my mind just complains and wants to do something else, and oftentimes it wins; I switch to something else. I know that if I just stick with something for 15 minutes, I can get a lot done, but the commitment to do that is often not there for the more challenging projects.

I've started to enjoy the feeling of getting through the initial discomfort of exercise and finding my stride. It just occurred to me that perhaps I am starting to get into "The Zone" more regularly, and this is contributing to my general sense of well-being. Also, there is a sense of accomplishment from having pushed through the initial resistance and achieved more than we anticipated; we often have fewer limits than we imagine.

As a supplementary technique for anti-procrastination training, I could see prescribing a 30 minute cardio session for the first week to get the body conditioned (I slept a LOT more that first week), then adding more challenging workouts in following weeks. This may be the most visceral way to provide the experience of pushing past a threshold to a meaningful achievement. Physical stress has a way of bringing out different parts of our behaviors, and it's certainly measurable (in terms of time) and tangible (in terms of the after effects of soreness). Dealing with the mental challenge of getting moving on a project make take similar discipline. We'll see how that theory works out this week, as I've got tons and tons of stuff to do.

» Missed part 1 and part 2? Or read on in part 4 of this series.

Mysteries of the Gym, Part II

I've historically not been one to enjoy physical activity, associating the experience with getting yelled out for being "offsides", water getting up my nose, and discomfort. Now that I'm older with a firmer grasp on myself, such things now bother me less. Finally, I can get with the serious business of enjoying myself.

One thing I love about trying to create new habits is the altered perspective I get on the world. This whole "go to the gym" idea is part of a progression of experimental behavioral changes that started with getting up early in the morning. Although my getting up early experiment seemed to fail after two weeks, I've noticed that an increased tendency to wake up early has naturally occurred. And I discovered something that was more important than an increase in productivity: I like seeing people in the morning. It makes all the difference for me, in the way that tall pine trees and four seasons are an essential part of my environment, which I learned the hard way by not having them while living in Florida.

Going to the gym every day is my second behavior change experiment, and I'm finding again that I'm learning things I didn't know before. Some of them are physical, but the really interesting one is how I can redefine success from even a short trial.

Habit Forming

If we were to bet money on whether people are capable establishing a new habit, I think many of us would say that failure is more probable than success. And that's true, from a certain point of view: when we think of new habits, we're generally talking about good habits that have, for one reason or another, eluded us. Sometimes they're bad habits we already have, and want to jettison.

There are some habits that we've formed without trying. In fact, our entire day is comprised of such habits: we call it "going to work", "the daily grind", "watching TV", "playing World of Warcraft"...you name it. If you're doing something more than a regular basis, you've proven you're capable of forming habits without thinking too much of it.

The habits we want to change are the hard ones, and require a combination of intrinsic and extrinsic motivating strategies to deal with. For me, going to the gym was intrinsically not interesting for years, until I got the idea that maybe it would be good to me AND I could base it off the positive experience I had, in hindsight, with waking up early. I also know that I react well to people in my morning ritual, and going to the gym every day would provide some measure of that.

I had mentioned before that I thought my previous experiment in waking up early had failed, because I wasn't waking up at the same time every day. For a while I had reverted back to my old habits. However, something important had happened: I knew the good parts of getting up early. When it's getting late, I now consider going to sleep earlier knowing that a morning start will feel good. I did not have this knowledge before. And I have also maintained a few other habits: going to the coffee shop in the morning, planning my day, and just immersing myself in the world for a bit before hunkering down in my basement. In short, I learned a lot about myself that I didn't know, and I learned more things I like. For the past few weeks, I've actually been getting up at 6:30 or 7:00 every morning without thinking too hard about it, and I like it. It feels like a treat.

Lowering the Bar

With that experience, I now have completely different expectations of going to the gym. I haven't set a goal to "lose weight" or "get buff". I'm trying it out just to see what happens. Success will be defined if I find some things I like doing.

There are a lot of wise sayings that mean nothing until you have personally experienced the context in which they can be applied. I never understood grief until my mother passed away, and I realized that I had been incapable of really relating with her on the level that she would have enjoyed. I never understood love songs until I fell in love and experience both joy and loss. And it took understanding both grief and love to understand the sacrifice of people in uniform, doing what they believe is the right thing because they have committed to the country and the people they love back home. Going to the gym is pretty mild by comparison, but the mechanism of experience leading to new wisdom is exactly the same.

With this in mind, I'm trying not to judge the experience as being good or bad, fun or not fun. I know that I can do this for at least two weeks, from prior experience with habit experiments, before I get bored. And even after that two weeks, I'll come away having experienced some things I didn't know before. Here's a few of them:

• Once you realize that you are there for yourself and yourself alone, it's easy to tune out all the people. They are there for the same reason: to better themselves. There is no competition with people, if you refuse to participate in that kind of thinking. Everyone is at a different stage of development, and you are at yours. I think that is the understanding: if you're there and doing things, you're there for the right reasons, and it doesn't matter what shape you're in. You're doing something about it, and that kicks ass. It is important to be around people like that when you're forming any kind of habit, assuming you're sensitive to this type of social energy.

• There is no need to make eye contact or make small talk at the gym. People are there to work out. The health club I'm at seems to be not too social, which had concerned me at first because I thought that meant it was unfriendly. Nope. It's just business. I found it interesting that this was a different social expectation than, say, walking around in Boston. Making eye contact in New England is at best a terse acknowledgment that you've been noticed, classified as a stranger, and you will not collide with each other. This acknowledging glance lasts about 1/3rd of a second, and between men it is sometimes accompanied by a very slight nod and a neutral frown. I would actually prefer to make eye contact and smile, but it just doesn't fly around here. At the gym, though, it's just that you've got work to do and people are in their own private spaces doing their thing.

• The first day I went to the gym, I rediscovered the fact that yes, there are generally two separate locker rooms, and there are sometimes even small signs that tell you which is which. I learned that I need to schedule an appointment with my optometrist.

• I have become aware that there's a need for the body to expend calories through sweat and real physical exertion. Now that I understand that "the burn" isn't actual discomfort, I'm starting to enjoy the feeling. By comparison with myself a week ago, it feels like I'm burning off energy cleanly that otherwise would have turned rancid from disuse. It's an interesting concept. I'm even enjoying the feeling that comes from moving around tired muscles. It's a physical reminder that I'm not just a disembodied brain absorbing information through high speed digital interfaces. That is good to remember.

• To my great surprise, I have started to enjoy the treadmill precisely because it's boring and easy to get lost in. I like monitoring the level of challenge I'm feeling, and upping/dropping the speed...it's a reliable way to maintain the heart rate without stressing myself too much. The Stairmaster and Bouncy Machine are interesting in bursts too, but they don't pace you as well or immediately. The Elliptical with the Arm Thingies I am starting to like as an alternate starter (I can't do both stairmaster and elliptical on the same day yet, I've found), but it requires a little more self will to keep moving. With the treadmill I can fine-tune the amount of challenge and it will maintain in a fluid and immediate manner. I finally bought an iPod too (that's a whole 'nother post in itself), and one thing I discovered today is that the treadmill is even more interesting when you match the speed of your footsteps to the beats-per-minute of the song.

• Learning to listen to my body has been interesting. I had gone Kayaking yesterday, and was feeling a little sore so I thought I might skip the gym today as to not overstress myself. A friend suggested that I go anyway, and just keep the routine light. So I did Elliptical + Treadmill. I was planning on going at least 20 minutes on the treadmill at a brisk pace, but then I noticed that my left leg had started to feel strained rather than tired. Alert! I whacked the "cooldown" button, which initiated the 2-minute cycle to ease out of the workout rather than just stopping dead cold. That was a cool moment, mind and body working together to ensure the integrity of my existence. Through this, I think I've learned my first lesson in recognizing a genuine warning signal.

The End Game

I don't know at this point if I'll maintain the health club habit as a permanent lifestyle choice, but I do finally have a personal point of reference that makes it more likely to happen. I've found some things I like about it, and I've gotten over the initial fear and self-consciousness of being a newbie and not in good shape. The more positive things I can learn from this experience that I enjoy, the greater the chance I'll stick with it; writing about the experience is part of my "positive results" strategy, as I like breaking down my experiences in this manner. Dorky, but it is part of my true nature.

The cool thing for me is this: I don't have to worry about losing weight or becoming more physically fit. It will happen as a natural byproduct if I stick with the program. Even if I don't, I now know that I don't mind sweating and exerting myself to remove that "rancid energy" feeling I didn't know I had.

The principle of trying a habit for a couple weeks just for the experience is one that I'll apply again in the future. If the habit doesn't stick, you can pull a few interesting things from the experience so it isn't a "waste" of time and energy. Think of it as laying a foundation for future efforts; that's always worthwhile, in my book.

» On to Part 3...

Tanabata, Plus Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day 5

Today is Tanabata, a Japanese Star Festival that falls on the 7th day of the 7th lunarsolar month. That's actually 2007-08-19 this year according to wikipedia, but 7/7 also corresponds to the fifth Groundhog Day Resolutions Review Day, on which I review my Groundhog Day's Resolutions and figure out how things have been going. It's particularly nice to celebrate Tanabata because the festival has a tradition in which you write down wishes related to bettering yourself. Afterwards you hang them in a bamboo tree, where presumably some universal force will notice and help bring them to fruition. This is very compatible with GHD Resolutions...we can all use a boost.

Last year I made some printable streamers, which I again printed out and wrote wishes upon. I didn't choose specific wishes, but wrote down forces that I would like to have more of right now; I'm trusting the "universal wish-granting force" to handle the implementation details for me---how's that for effective executive delegation? The wishes themselves were just single words describing what I'm in the mood for:

• Camaraderie
• Silliness
• Receptiveness
• Delight
• Resolution

Then I hung them on the tree. I'll burn the wishes at midnight on my grill, as I understand the tradition to be.

PICKING OFF FROM LAST MONTH

The basic premise behind Groundhog Day's Resolutions is this: Make resolutions on February 2nd instead of January 1st when we're caught up. Check your progress every "month plus one day" (3/3, 4/4, 5/5, and so forth).

My three main 2007 resolutions:

1. Make Money from Writing and Making Stuff
2. Build a Sustainable Social Network
3. Sell a Product This Year

Last month I had stumbled slightly and not gotten my action items done. This month, the same thing happened: I completely blew off my action items, which were as follows:

• June 13: Get the ETP Printed, Dang It!
• June 20: Put the HUB statement on the website.
• June 27: Create some original content, like a booklet or number of thoughts, and sticking it up on Lulu.com or Blurb.

I had forgotten to schedule these on my Google Calendar. It was a pretty busy month from both a business and personal perspective, and I dropped the ball. Although a lot did get done, the whole point of having a resolution is to really make a change, deliberately.

Here's the current status:

1. Getting the ETP Printed!

This is the new pre-printed emergent task planner sheet I had designed, for selling as an actual product. Convenient, beautiful, affordable...that's the idea! And, this is a way to dip my toe into productive development without risking too much.

I did draw up an initial plan on how to get this launched, and talked to my friend Scott to get it priced out at various area printers. It's been taking longer than expected with my busy schedule. My next action item, once we have the pricing figured out, is to put up some kind of order page for "pre orders", so we can arrange to have exactly that number printed. After that, it's figuring out payment, packaging, and shipping. Because we're looking at using an offset press instead of print-on-demand, after the initial run our incremental cost will much lower.

2. Put the HUB statement on the Website! A HUB statement is a form of elevator pitch that emphasizes your "hottest undeniable benefit" to a very specific target audience. By having a HUB statement, you can really effectively communicate what you do to people who actually would be interested in working with you. By putting this statement on my website, it would likely improve the chances of people figuring out they want to work with me.

I have been slowly getting clear about what it is that I do well and is worth paying for:

• critical analysis, architecture, and planning
• information graphic design
• experience design

and how I do it:

• investigative design
• scientific creative methodologies
• using media to create stories that unfold in real life

All this information, in addition to how people can initiate the process of working with me, has to go on the website. It's been driving me nuts for the past few weeks, because I feel the website structure and navigation is somehow holding me back.

There has been some movement though: I've decided that I'm going to use Expression Engine for the base of my next website path, because it has the features I need in one fairly inexpensive integrated package. I have slowly been figuring out how to transition the features of my existing WordPress installation into an Expression Engine equivalent.

3. Create Original Content and Stick it on Lulu.com!

I originally thought of rewriting some of the Printable CEO materials into book form, but this didn't happen. If I'd scheduled it into my google calendar maybe I would have remembered. There were a couple of book-related activities, however:

• Last month I had worked on my first print piece, a perfect-bound printed book of glossy photos. I got to use InDesign for this project, and found that it was actually a rather pleasant environment to work in.

• I was talking to a friend of mine about writing children's books, so I decided to use what I'd learned while using InDesign for the print piece to try laying out A Bee Story, the writing experiment I did last August.

It took a while to figure the best way to import the text---I copied the HTML from the browser and pasted it into InDesign. You can take a peek at the Bee Story PDF, formatted for a 6x9 Lulu run. I'm not planning on printing it; for one thing, it hasn't been proofread or reworked in any way. Each story segment was written in one sitting, four periods for 4 days, without any planning. It's at best structured stream-of-consciousness writing. However, I picked up some knowledge of how I would lay out an actual book: this likely will be some kind of PCEO-related booklet. In the meantime, it's just convenient to see the entire bee story in one document.

ACTION ITEMS

Since the website is so much on my mind, I'm scheduling a two-hour block of time tomorrow to try to resolve the remaining issues. These are largely related to just learning EE's template langauge, though I also need to redesign the large photo header at the top of the page to visually define each distinct content area. July 8.

Getting the ETP printed is a big deal, so I'm hoping to have a good idea of the pricing required on a good piece of paper. After that, it's time to figure out how to create some kind of pre-ordering system, and it's time to formally think about customer service. July 12.

Finally, creating some of the new original content for printing: I have a lot of content that can be repurposed and clarified; it's just outgrown the simple blog-journal / category model of information hierarchy; I need to start making this site look like a real website while retaining the community model of the blogosphere. I think that will be a huge relief. Until then, I can at least start creating review PDFs that describe every system on the website, and move them to the Wiki. I've scheduled some time to do this. July 19.